Darkness and Light

I was doing some reading earlier, I had just opened a copy of Unseen Academicals by Terry Pratchett. On the first page of the Story and its rather long Footnote he talks about how the crown survived by clinging on in the 

"sprawling, brawling, squalling consciousness of the city itself."

and that

"There are all kinds of Darkness, and all things can be found in them, imprisoned, banished, lost or hidden. Sometimes they escape. Sometimes they simply fall out. Sometimes they simply can't take it any more."

This spoke to me as earlier today I had watched a program on he Victoria Climbie murder and how she had been failed by various organisations that were supposed to help, and the news had had a fair bit about the Treyvon Martin case in Florida. As I watched the Program on Victoria Climbie I heard my dad say some very sickening things about the girls family, one was:

" These African Family's trade kids like Pokemon cards." and "All African kids need to be DNA tested to show that the people claiming to be their parents are, because the blacks use the kids to get benefits off the government." Now I know that Victoria's family were duped by the woman who killed her but to paint the population of an entire continent with the same brush because of the actions of a select few? That just isn't right.

I know that times of economic depression hardens the heart but this display of rampant racism and Xenophobia is getting a bit beyond the pale and even what I'm willing to tolerate, and I can tolerate a hell of a lot even to the point of taking the blame for another person's actions (especially if I love them). I understand that this is in the darkness of Britain and America's collective psyche, especially in the old Confederate states of which Florida is one, but its not in mine I am a great believer in total equality irrespective of race, colour, or creed. 

But there is darkness in all of us, and what we hide in there can either give us strength to carry on or destroy us and those we claim to love. Take myself as an example I have a thankfully short lived dependency in Codeine this has taught me a lot one of which is that I'm not as emotionally strong as I thought I was as I used it to cover the emotional pain I was in the cause of which was the amount of time I spent with people who honestly cared more for themselves that others, my family in short. This pain led me to almost kill my Ex-girlfriend, talking of which she has a much deeper and often more destructive darkness. Hers hides a rage started by her Rapes. This rage has often clouded her judgement and led her to blame herself for the actions of others and to become overly aggressive towards men, this is not unheard of in cases of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I know of women who were Raped t a young age who became total Berzerkers in any argument with a man usually those they called loved ones, this has led to some being totally celibate even after their treatment. I hope this isn't the case with Wendy as she could be a great mother and lover to the right person. I was not the right person as I am naturally something of a lone wolf, ironic that my Native American zodiac animal is that of the Wolf, I have little need for a huge social circle while Wendy needs at least one person around in order to feel totally safe.

Though ultimately life is not about darkness it is about light and the light is in all of us, we just need to look for it inside of ourselves and use it to guide us to that happiness we all seek. Be it in the arms of another, in a fulfilling career or a life of quiet contemplation, but in order to find that light we have to walk the dark paths for that is where the light shines brightest.

I hope you all find that light you seek, Brightest Blessings.

Steven